About the Golf Course -

As you know I’ve had my operatives raising Cain all over the city, and so before they cool off I felt this would be a good time for me to clear up a few things up about my 4-wheeler outing with Chris Peterson and Scott Brown’s perversions.

If you just go to images.google.com and type in bush kiss Saudi or bush holding hands Saudi you’ll understand. Or you can click here, here, and here.

You may recall the help that Papa Bush gave the Arabs with the gulf war and how he’s gotten a lot of fat cash from “consulting” contracts from the Saudis since them. His son, GW has driven the price of oil up by a factor of three times what it was when Clinton was president, and so when GW leaves office he knows he’ll be taken care of too. How else do you think people like the Bushes get rich? How else do you expect somebody like me to?

Getting to the point, what Clinton did with Monica Lewinski was nasty, and what Scott Brown wanted to do with the women here in the city offices was nasty too. But as the old man who lived next door to me when I was a boy used to say: It’s nasty to do that with a girl, but it’s different when it’s with a friend.

You know I don’t care for sodomites and those Democrats and their queer parades with guys holding hands and kissing in public and all that. But remember, it’s different if the two men are good conservatives, or if they’re doing business, or if they’re part of the same club or whatever. So for instance, if Bush holds hands and French kisses an Arab guy it’s ok since he’s a good Republican. It’s just a way for a man to tell another man how he feels.

Anyway I was at Chris Peterson’s house, helping him look for those pills his wife makes him take a half hour before they go to bed and I was thinking that I could do a lot more for a man like Chris and he could do a lot more for me. So I arranged for us to ride some 4-wheelers on the golf course. Lots of fresh air and scrub oak and who knows what could happen? We even took some friends along. I told Chris what happens on the golf course, stays on the golf course.

I know it’s illegal to ride 4-wheelers on the golf course, but I told Greiner to keep his men far away. Awhile later, Schwebke from the paper called so I gave him a story and he printed it: A famous designer wanted to ride around on the mud and mush to look at the dead grass. Yeah, right.

But nothing happened with Chris and me – this time. So just remember, when you see two men Frenching they might not be gays. They might just be good friends like Bush and the Saudis are, or like Chris Peterson and I could be. A man’s gotta have friends, and a man’s gotta make a living.